'We would love to be able to report that Christians
are living very distinct lives and impacting the community, but ... in the area of divorce rates they continue to be the same,"
"An analysis of Planned Parenthood's clinic visit records highlights a dismal truth. Nearly
35,000 medical charts from fourteen affiliates coast-to-coast revealed that 62% of the girls receiving abortions identified
themselves as Evangelical Christian. Another 20% professed to be either Catholic or Orthodox. Of those 82%, a full 76% identified
their local church membership and pastor! The notion that it is primarily "rank heathens" or "flaming liberals" who are aborting
their future away simply doesn't hold up. The scandal of Planned Parenthood has become the scandal of Christian churches.
Sowing the wind, they have reaped the whirlwind (Hos. 8:7)."
While the illegitimate children of the children of Christians all over christendom are falling
into unmarked graves, the stars of the heavens (church leadership) are falling in ever increasing proportions into the sin-bed
Also check out what I say about this at:
How could there be so little difference between professing Christians, their children and the
Could it be because Christians more often than not focus on the same things the world does?
Many Christians can try to ignore these statistics by saying that these folks must not be real
Christians but this is really skirting the issue rather than addressing it.
We can probably agree that if they are true Christians they are immature ones.
But really what is an immature Christian?
Could it be one that goes to church on Sunday and professes faith in Christ but thinks Christ
is equal to or secondary to the affairs of life and ones family?
Isn't the family considered an affair of life?
Paul says: "An unmarried man is concerned about the Lord's affairs--how he can please
the Lord. 33 But a married man is concerned about the affairs of this world--how he can please his wife-- 34
and his interests are divided."
Here the single and childless apostle Paul equates being concerned about ones wife as being
concerned about the affairs of this world.
I didn't say it, Paul did!
So being focused on the family (wife and children) is being focused on the affairs of the world
and is put in stark contrast to being 'concerned about the Lord's affairs.'
Is James Dobson in effect taking the focus off of God and placing it on the family?
And obviously Paul is talking about a Christian family here.
Could this be why many Christians, Catholics and some Mothers in the interest of protecting
the family from the ones that would attack the traditional family, personally attack those (including Jesus and Paul) that
remind them (Luke 11:27;1 Cor. 7; ) that discipleship takes precedence over and should influence Parenthood and Marriage.
When I posted a message in a group of more than 800 members, instead of offering a scriptural response was accused of being
I've answered all their emotional arguments, really attacks in this message.
When I posted Motherhood, Fatherhood or Discipleship:
and Focus on the Family?
from my site, The Moderator of the 800+ member group mentioned above responded this
"Dear BJ: I've read some of your past posts, and it occurs to me that you must be a very lonely
person and, through much pain, you have come up with this way of dealing with your isolation. Please know that you are in
my prayers. In His love, Diane."
She moderated me after I didn't see any love in this offer.
In fact after she wrote this she moderated me shortly afterwards, then went on an emotional
and Christless tirade, now confident that I couldn't respond.
It would seem to me that if someone was so confident of the validity of their viewpoint that
they wouldn't be so quick to moderate someone while at the same time continuing to take potshots at them.
She then says, ..."As I pointed out to him, each one of these posts betrays his deep- seated
bitterness and resentment concerning Christianity and Christians, and I can't help but think the man needs serious prayer.
You know?? "
Then after a friend stated that he saw nothing antifamily about what I said, the moderator said
"By the way, there is no valid reason for a Christian couple to be childless - if we truly believe
that abortion is wrong (and it is), then we have to present the young, frightened women who face this hideous situation with
a workable option - that is, carrying her child to term and placing it with a good Christian family to raise and love. A "childless
Christian" couple ought to be an oxymoron. (Just my opinion.)
Imagine the many couples that don't have children for whatever reason and the incredibly cold
and unscriptural statement this is.
And she also said , batchlerhood is a pathetic existence...
Misspelling is hers.
Obviously, she will have Jesus and Paul to consider when she gets to the pearly gates.
I would hate to meet her in a dark alley one day.
Is it me or does she seem to be the bitter one?
Come to find out she has been married three times and doesn't know whether the third one is
going to work out.
This is equal in audacity to Mary Baker Eddy (founder of Christian Science), who
suffered greatly from constant illnesses, telling her followers that sin, sickness and death is an illusion.
Her (this moderator's) fictional online name is, LadyGilligan.
Named after the fictional single and childless sailor on television.
Fortunately, two people in the group seemed to see through her attack and acknowledged
that being single and without children allows one to minister without distractions.
However, it seems that they conformed again to Mother's unscriptural viewpoint.
What I did notice is her motherly control of this group of over 800.
It prompted me to speak of Group Think and Cliques in the Church at:
Groupthink and Cliques in the Church
Paul says: "But a married man is concerned about the affairs of this world--how he can please
his wife-- 34 and his interests are divided."
If the average Christian married man has divided loyalties, imagine if he has kids to take care
I've seen the children of the typical Christian family and they have their hands full.
Taking care of one's family is a honorable thing.
Taking care of ones family is commanded and very important but it is put second to Christ, and
is defined as an 'affair of the world'. (1 Timothy 5:8)
Well, Jesus must have been bitter also.
He forgot to get married and have children and lead a truly fulfilled life. If he had only listened
to James Dobson's radio show or read the DaVinci Code.
The apostle Paul must also have been bitter that he had no biological family and all he had
to show for his efforts were multitudes of spiritual sons and daughters. (1 Timothy 1:2,18; 2 Timothy 1:2; 2:1; Titus 1:4)
What a miserable bane of existence he must have led.
I'm married but have no children and because my wife and I work where we live we can minister
while we are working, we have plenty of time for our marriage, fun and ministry.
In fact, our marriage is a truly blessed union that is not typical.
But everywhere we look we see marriages and those with children and know the majority of these
folks 'focus on the family' to the exclusion of Christ and ministry, by virture of the fact that they make Christ only equal
to the family, and you may see them on church on Sunday.
But that is when they go wrong because the focus should not be on the family first or at the
same time but on God.
'Seek Ye first the kingdom and his righteousness....
Jesus said so, Paul said so!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Notice what happens when Jesus is talking about repossession and I don't mean of one's furniture.
27 As Jesus was saying these things, a woman
in the crowd called out, "Blessed is the mother who gave you birth and nursed you." 28 He replied, "Blessed
rather are those who hear the word of God and obey it."
Notice that while he was speaking of a spiritual matter a woman blurted out, 'Blessed is the
Isn't this just like the many Mothers, Conservative Christians or Catholics that while
Jesus is speaking, they want to change the focus to the family, specifically to the mother?
Notice Jesus did not say Amen and it is also a blessed thing to be a disciple.
No He said, "Blessed Rather..."
I could just hear Christians of today saying to Jesus, You must be a lonely man for saying such
This is akin to an infidel saying, 'You're just saying Jesus is the answer because you're a
This is what Paul says of marriage:
It is good for a man not to marry
7 I wish that all men were as I am. But each
man has his own gift from God; one has this gift, another has that. 8 Now to the unmarried and the widows I say:
It is good for them to stay unmarried, as I am. 9 But if they cannot control themselves, they should marry,
for it is better to marry than to burn with passion.
And a husband must not divorce his wife
But if you do marry, you have not sinned; and if a virgin marries, she has not sinned. But those
who marry will face many troubles in this life, and I want to spare you this.
Boy, Paul must have had a bad girlfriend at one time, because he comes across as being very
And all this time we just thought he was being instructed by God to write this.
An unmarried man is concerned about the Lord's affairs--how he can please the Lord. 33
But a married man is concerned about the affairs of this world--how he can please his wife-- 34 and his interests are
divided. An unmarried woman or virgin is concerned about the Lord's affairs: Her aim
is to be devoted to the Lord in both body and spirit. But a married woman is concerned about the affairs of this world--how
she can please her husband. 35 I am saying this for your own good, not to restrict you, but that you may live in a
right way in undivided devotion to the Lord. 1 Corinthians 7
I was raised in a Baptist Church, this church will probably be raptured first because the Bible
says that, 'the dead in Christ will rise first.'
However, our first pastor was a gem, He would sometimes weep right at the pulpit.
After church, families would go to the local 'All You Can Eat' place, i.e., Furrs.
Our family went there and two other families would go there together.
They were from our church as well. They did this every Sunday.
They seemed to be a model family and focusing on the family was what they seemed to be doing.
Later on in life, I was told that the mother of the one family comitted adultery with the husband
of the other family.
Each family went through a divorce.
Later, I ran across the son of one of the families. We talked and I found out that he had married
a Mormon and they were getting a divorce.
What good does it do to focus on the family or someone elses family when your first focus is
This mess had an effect on the children and even the son ended up marrying and divorcing a Mormon.
Our allegiance is to Christ and we are not to be the typical families.
The Single and/or childless Christians of this world have quite a ministry trying to spiritually
rescue the multitudes of children that weren't properly discipled by the parents that were too busy focusing on them rather
Discipleship and having a spiritual family is more important, but if one's biological family
follows Christ then that is fantastic.
John Wesley put a great emphasis on Spiritual Parenting when he said,
"From the terrible instances I have met with in all parts of England, I am more and more convinced
that the devil himself desires nothing more than this, that the people of any place should be half awakened and then left
to themselves to go to sleep again." ... "I was more than ever convinced that the preaching like an apostle, without joining
together those that are awakened and training them in the ways of God is only begetting children for the murderer...The consequence
is that nine in ten of the once awakened are faster asleep than ever."
Though I don't believe one that has become a New Creation but not discipled, is only fuel for
the fire, I have seen and do believe that new believers that are not discipled in the faith do fall asleep again and are in
danger of backsliding. This is why this is more important than the merely biological family.
Jesus even said he came to create division in families. (Luke 12:51ff)
What created these divisions?
It was divided over those who wanted to serve Christ and those that didn't want to serve him
or add him after they had 'focused on the family.'
What are some indicators that Christians are putting family on an equal level or more important than
1) When parents are getting divorced at an equal rate to the world and their children are getting
abortions or believing false teachings.
Focusing on one's family, i.e., the affairs of life, is not enough to save the family because
it makes one oblivious to the real focus and others.
Jesus didn't ask for equal billing he demanded top billing.
"10 Therefore, as we have opportunity, let us do good to all people, especially to those who belong to the family of believers." (Galatians 6, NIV)
20 Someone told him, "Your mother and brothers are
standing outside, wanting to see you." 21 He replied, "My mother and brothers are those who hear God's word and
put it into practice." (Luke 8)
Nothing about being especially good to our biological families.
And of course some don't like the following verse where we know that Mary was a disciple of
Christ but yet Christ still doesn't single her out and ask her in when told that his mother was outside.
In fact He places Her with the other believers, if she continues to obey Him.
Another indicator of the wrong focus is:
2) Christians getting bent out of shape and making personal and Christless attacks when one
speaks of putting Christ over ones family, as Christ and Paul did.
Check Out Our Group called 'Cliques and Cults' at:
BJ Maxwell 05/22/2006, 06/01/2006